It's official... June 28

The next batch of referrals are on their way. This group covered June 16 - 28, 13 days. More importantly, it looks like it includes nearly twice as many referrals as last month. Since up until this past week it looked like referrals would only go through June 23rd, this is a much better show than originally predicted.

So, where does this leave me? My best guess right now (I'm feeling pretty optimistic today) is that I will receive my referral in September or October with travel in November or December. As long as I'm back by December 24 (homestudy expires), I won't have to redo any paperwork.

Need to laugh

This bubble wrap site was posted on RQ today, thanks Liz. Make sure you have your volume turned on when you hit the "fresh sheet" button. Very fun and a good stress reliever. I'm thinking I need a new link heading named "Need to laugh" for when this process becomes too much to take. If you know of any fun, silly sites that would make a good addition, please add link to the comments below.

More rumors...

There are now four agencies that have told their clients that this next cutoff will go through LID June 28, 2005. Hopefully, the referrals will be sent by tomorrow and we'll see the CCAA site change. If it turns out to be correct, I view this 13 days of referrals as a huge improvement over the past 4-5 months and hopefully a sign of an increase in referral numbers. This would also keep the current wait at right around 12 months. I'm hoping that the CCAA's plan includes keeping the wait no longer than 12 months. And, yes, I do believe there is and always has been a plan.

Summer Fun

The theme for this month's secret pal exchange is summer fun and as you can see, my secret pal has this down. Wow, Ava is going to love all her sandbox toys. The cat bookmark is adorable- I need to print off a photo of Sammy to add to it. And, I love the notecards as well.

Thanks Secret Pal for all the fun summer gifts. We're all set for Ava's first summer home- 2007.

Potato sack baby

I've been following a blog of a family that is currently in China. They have 2 bio daughters, one 3-year old daughter from China and they are there to get their 4th daughter, she's 19-months.

They've been to China before so it looks like they took more time to really plan a vacation prior to receiving their daughter. As part of their trip, they went to the Great Wall but in an area that is not touristy. It's very steep and has a chain that you can hold onto while you're making the 3-mile uphill walk. The father carried the 3-year old up.

The next day they went to another province that required an uphill, 4-mile hike (one way) to get to this beautiful postcard setting. As someone who would have died trying to make either of these hikes, I was really impressed.

Then, about two days later, they get their daughter. After about a day or two the mom writes how sore her back and arms are from carrying the baby. Say it isn't so. If this way-too-fit-mother is feeling pain carrying her daughter, what chance do I have?

How many of you waiting families are carrying around your potato sack baby to prepare? I'm trying to decide whether this will help.

Lost in translation

As those of you who follow the Rumor Queen know, the rumors were all over the place this past week. One or two agencies told their families that they were told the CCAA would change their site on Saturday so many families have been stalking the site for the past 24 hours. Nothing.

One women posted on RQ that she went on the CCAA site at 4:30 am eastern time and the site design was different but when she went back to it, the site was back to what it normally looks like. Of course all the waiting families assumed that a "change" to the site would be an update of dossiers reviewed, possibly dossiers referred or maybe the elusive "new rules" for adopting from China. Maybe what they intended all along was a redesign of the site.

A new tote

Just added a new tote to my Ava Totes site.

Age by Chocolate

Sent by my aunt, to my dad, to me...

Don't tell me your age; you probably would tell a falsehood anyway-but the Hershey Man will know!

YOUR AGE BY CHOCOLATE MATH
This is pretty neat. DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST! It takes less than a minute.

Work this out as you read ...Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50 -- I'll wait while you get the calculator

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1756 ....If you haven't, add 1755.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.You should have a three digit number


The first digit of this was your original number(I.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week.)The next two numbers are . . .

YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!!!)THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2006) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS

Home improvements

Since it appears I have some extra time on my hands, I've decided to start a home improvement project. I've been thinking about this for a few weeks and I think the living room/dining room area will be the next project.

A few of the changes I'm thinking about include new curtains and the addition of valences, possibly adding a ledge to the windows and recovering the seat cushions on the dining room set to match curtains.

The artwork will definitely come down and I still don't have any ideas on what will replace it. I'm also considering selling the couch and chair. The space isn't that large so I thought some chairs might be more flexible than the couch. Since I'm trying to keep this project from getting too expensive, new furniture might not be an option.
I really like these ultra suede chairs that I found at Sam's Club. They're a khaki green although they appear more tan/grey in photo. I was thinking of getting two of these with the leather chair shown below.
This chair is really comfortable and I think the chocolate brown compliments the other chairs nicely. I haven't made any decisions but would love to get started in the next few weeks.

Friday Five

In my August DTC group, a member of the group, Marie, has been posting the Friday Five questions for families to get to know one another. I thought I'd start posting my responses to my blog as well.

1. Who is travelling to China to get the baby?
I will be traveling with both my parents and I have to add that they are VERY excited about going.

2. Do you have a packing list ready?
No, I figure that will be a fun thing to do once I'm about a month from referral. My mother, on the other hand, has had an ongoing list for months and revises it often. :D

3. Have you purchased anything for your trip yet?
Yes. I have a lot of baby stuff including disposable bibs, washcloths, changing pads, etc. I also bought a new set of luggage.

4. Are you planning to bring a baby carrier? if yes, which type?
Yes. I purchased the Hip Hammock.

5. Do you have any travel tips/warnings to share? (It can be something you learned on a previous adoption trip in another group or in your other travels.)
Nothing that we probably all haven't heard before.

Congratulations to the Grad!

Alex graduated from high school this week- whoohoo! We're all very proud of him. And, I think all of us who attended the graduation should also be congratulated for sitting on metal bleachers, at the end of May, in Arizona, for 3 1/2 hours.

Day 1 of Month 9

Today marks the beginning of the ninth month since my LID of 9/26. The CCAA is supposed to make some announcement this week. There is much speculation on what this will be.

Will they talk about the slow down, about what timeframe their expecting the program to continue at or will it be more of the same "more families adopting domestically, less babies being abandoned." Although I'm sure both of these things are a small factor, I simply don't believe that there was suddenly such a drastic increase in domestic adoptions or decrease in abandonments to account for the quick change in timelines we've seen since Oct/Nov 2005.

I do believe the Hunan baby trafficking has caused the biggest impact on the slowdown but I would be surprised to see the CCAA talk about this.

There is also some thought that they might add some additional restrictions to adopting families with the families that are already LID having to meet the new criteria. The most talked about at this time is regarding weight.

I have to admit that I'm a bit nervous about what they're going to say. I know that if they're going to increase the timeline to some unreasonable wait (say 18-24 months) that it would be better to just know this but it would still be a huge disappointment to not have Ava home by the holidays.

Disappointing day

This month's 9 day batch of referrals was definitely a let down. They went from June 7 to 15. The earlier rumors had anticipated that the CCAA would make it through June 20-21, completing two full weeks. Not great but it at least left hope that next month's referrals could make it through mid-July.

The Russian government announced today that "Moscow will stop foreigners adopting children outside officially registered agencies in a step toward limiting the number of children who leave Russia". I don't know what impact this will have on people who are currently in that program but I'm sure the families that are already in process have to be really worried. That's a terrible situation to be in. The Eastern European countries are not known for their compassion or understanding for either the children or families of international adoption.

So, compared to the terrible blow that the families waiting for children from Russia felt today, waiting longer to complete an adoption in China isn't that bad. Although the CCAA hasn't exactly been forthcoming with information, they do seem to want the program to continue and, even though the referral batches have been very small these past three months (5, 7, 9 days), they are, at the very least, still referring children.

Secret Pal strikes again

My August Secret Pal sent us these great gifts this month. The hooded pool towel is too cute. It's a flower top. Along with the purple sunglasses, Ava will be set for some summer fun. The magnets are already on the frig. Thanks so much.

Two at the Zoo

My twin nieces, Kayla and Kenzie, turned two this week. We celebrated at the Zoo last Sunday. Of course it turned out to be the hottest day of the year so far at about 99 degrees. The girls were real troopers - unlike the adults who complained about the heat constantly- myself included ;)

7-months from LID

Today also marks my 7-month anniversary from LID.

I've been reviewed

The September LID people have officially left the review room and entered the matching room. This is a big milestone. It basically means that my dossier has been reviewed and approved for adoption by the CCAA. Now it sits in the matching room along with all the dossiers for June, July, August & September. My best guess is that there are about 5000-6000 dossiers on top of mine. I'm still hopeful for a September referral but not holding my breath.

Two new US citizens

At our AZ FCC waiting families dinner last night, we welcomed home two of Arizona's newest residents and two very happy families. Both of the girls are so beautiful. It was so fun seeing the babies and hearing about the great times both families had in China.

Re-fingerprinting

I went in yesterday to update my fingerprints for my orphan petition (I171). Good news, they haven't changed.

Since my last appointment (Feb, 2005) took about 3 hours, I went in all prepared to spend my Saturday there. I had my book, notepad, sweater (incase in was cold inside) and a bottle of water. There was no one there. I walked in, filled out a quick form and was immediately brought back for fingerprinting. I should be good for another 15 months. I know I've said this before given this is my eighth fingerprinting since starting this adoption, but, this is my FINAL fingerprinting.

Ladybug earrings

My parents gave me these adorable earrings for Easter. I figure I'll wear them to China then put them away for Ava.

Pooh outfit

Found this Winnie the Pooh outfit at Mervyns last night. I've started purchasing 18 and 24 month stuff only- actually, I've been trying not to purchase anything but...

Baby Mulan from my Secret Pal

My August secret pal sent Ava the most adorable Mulan baby doll. She is so cute and I'm sure Ava will have lots of fun with her.
My Pal also put together a booklet about the history of Mulan- what a great idea. She researched the story and compiled the info herself. Thank you, Secret Pal, for being so thoughtful. Once again, you've been a great pal!

Easter Brunch

To celebrate Easter, my family went for brunch today at a golf club that's about five minutes from my home. It was a beautiful day to eat outside. The twins just wanted to run free. They loved the ducks and huge fish that were in the pond. The carp were about 20" long and came right up to the edge of the pond to get food. I'm gonna guess that we weren't the first to throw them food.
Alex trying to keep hold of the twins, Kenzie & Kayla. They're a real handful these days.

Bianca and Paige had their face's painted.
This is my sister Sharon, brother-in-law Steve with their three children.
My mom and sister, Debi. We just found out this week that Ava's newest cousin, due in late August, is going to be a boy. We're all happy about this.
My dad with nephew Alex.
The girls with the Easter bunny.

Flower cake

We're having a potluck at work tomorrow. Here is my addition. I haven't made a decorated cake in some time. Inside is a rum cake with custard and strawberries.

Is this really so wrong...

I'm at the nail salon for a pedicure. All the people that work at the salon I go to are from Vietnam. I've been going there a while so my nail girl "K" always asks about the adoption. Here's how the conversation went (after telling her that things were pretty slow right now):

K: You know, I have family in Vietnam. I'm sure they can find a baby for you. If my sister had 3 kids and I had none, she would give me one of hers- that's commonly done. It would be easy to find you a baby.
Me: Really... and how would I get her back to the US?
K: You can travel there to get her.
Me: Without a passport for her? Definitely illegal.
K: What if you travel there and take her back as your own (birth child)?
Me: YOU can travel there and possibly claim her as your own but I couldn't get away with that. Short of moving to Vietnam, I just don't see how this would work out. Even with the BM willingly giving up the baby, it would still be baby trafficing, if not kidnapping since I never legally adopted the baby. Thanks for trying to help but, no.

This had to be one on my more "interesting" conversations with K. Definitely a different perspective.

September DTC Pins

The September DTC lapel pins arrived this week. A big thank you to Jack for the ordering of the pins. And, a thanks to Phil for the design. I think they look really nice and as cloisonne pins, they will last forever.

I look forward to trying to find other September Moongazers while in China.

Good luck card

I had to share this thank you card that my niece Paige drew for me. Of course, that's me in the middle (stunning resemblence- especially the Barbie like figure) holding Paige and Bianca's hands.

The message is hard to read on this photo because it's in gold. It reads "Dear Aunti Shell, I love you so, so much. I hope you get your baby very, very soon. XOXOX Love, Paige"

Notice the ladybug and four-leaf clovers that are all around for good luck. They are just so sweet.

Stop to smell the roses

As is the case with all projects in my home, Sammy likes to play a part.
Here she is giving basic craft instructions before we get started.
Sammy is always willing to lend a hand, especially if it's sitting on top of the project you're working on.

The completed rose vases. They did a great job.

It is a craft night sleep over for my two oldest nieces, Paige and Bianca. In addition to the roses, they went on an Easter egg hunt, had their nails painted (orange), baked chocolate chip cookies, and colored Easter eggs- tomorrows lunch.

Helpful medical items for trip

The AZ FCC Waiting Families dinner was last night. Kathy, from FCCAZ , mother of two daughters from China and pharmacist, was our guest speaker. She handed out a great list of medical items to bring on the trip. Here is a shortened explanation of the items:

1. Antibiotics- 10 day supply. Some that do not require refrigeration include: Zithromax, Biaxin, Bactrim or Septra. Antibotics may be needed for ear infections, skin infections and pneumonia. Cefzil covers all three conditions.

2. Syringe- to give medications.

3. Elimite or Eurax cream- prescription cream to treat scabies.

4. Nix cream rinse or Permethin 1% - head lice. Nix is safe for children.

5. Acetaminophen drops- for an irritable child running a fever of 101 or more. Dose: 1 dropperful (1/2 tsp) for child 13 to 17 pounds. Can give every 4 to 6 hours. As a pharmacist, she DOES NOT recommend giving baby Motrin.

6. Digital Rectal thermometer- they're safer than glass and the ear thermometers are not that accurate on babies.

7. Benadryl- It is safe to give 1/4 to 1/2 tsp every 6 hours during the flight home if your child is not consolable.

8. Mylicon drops- for gas and irritability caused by stomach upset. May dose up to 20 x per day- very safe. One dropperful per dose.

9. Hydrocortisone cream 1%- may be helpful with rashes due to bug bites, new soap, clothes, etc. Do not use if rash looks infected.

10. Desitin diaper rash cream- diaper rash is dry, red, irritated skin- it's not weepy.

11. Nystatin cream or Lotrimin cream- may be used for diaper rashes that are red and weepy, often caused by a yeast infection. This often occurs when children are on antibotics.

12. Babylax or glycerin suppositories- useful for constipation. It may be helpful to try mixing apple juice in a one to one ratio with water before going to this extreme.

13. Saline nose drops- such as Ocean, Nasal or Ayr. For restoring moisture and for nasal congestion. It is especially helpful before eating or going down for a nap when the nose gets congested.

14. Pedialyte or KaoLectrolyte- formula substitute to use incase of diarrhea. NOTE: if you run out of pedialyte, you can mix a pinch of salt and 1/2 a sugar packet with water in bottle- will work the same. Kathy mentioned that she did this with all water bottles while they were in China.

15. Small ear syringe- Put one spray of saline solution in nose then suction the nose once (not repeatedly) with the ear syringe (smaller than the nose syringe) for nasal congestion.

16. Adult medications- if you are prone to sinus infections, it is suggested that you bring along a prescription sinus medication for the adults. Also, I didn't realize that prescription medications should all have a pharmacy label on them.

17. Eucerin, Cetaphil or Aveeno Baby lotion- Asian children have very dry skin so a good lotion is needed. Stay away from scented lotions.

Note: most of this list was provided by Deborah Borchers, MD

Another really helpful thing that Kathy provided was the web address for the Pediatric Medical Kit (formally the Texas Medical Kit). It costs $85 but includes presciption antibotics and scabby cream as well as a number of other over the counter items. I don't think you can order until you have a referral and some specific baby info. The address is: http://www.orphanallies.org

The last thing she handed out was a 6 page document that comes from the FCC website on "Medical testing recommended for International Adoptees" http://fwcc.org/pediatricexam.html Some really good info. Kathy suggested bringing this list to your pediatrician since most are not well versed in international adoptions and what they should be testing and vaccinating for. I've heard mixed views on re-vaccinating your child. She recommended it but this is something each family will need to decide.

6 months from LID

Tomorrow will mark the 6 month anniversary from my LID of Sept 26. The crappy thing is that I don't know if that puts me 75%, 50% or just 25% through the process. I could adjust to any timeframe if I just knew what to expect.

After spending the past four days at a Photoshop World conference in South Miami Beach with no computer access, I was looking forward to coming back to some good referral news. Instead, I'm hearing some nonsense about the next group only covering 5 days worth of LIDs- May 26 to May 30. Say it isn't so. If this turns out to be true, I can't even think about where that would put my referral timeframe.

The CCAA also posted that they've reviewed dossiers through August 31. This makes the referral rumors even more puzzling. If the reason things seem to be going slower is because there are more dossiers to process, doesn't it make sense that the back up would take place in the review room where they are actually reading and approving your dossier?? By the time a dossier goes to the referral room, it should be a pretty simple process. As far as there not being enough paper-ready babies, that seems pretty simple to fix as well. From everything I've ready, less than 10% of the babies in the SWI system are adopted. There definitely doesn't seem to be a shortage of babies.

I'm really trying to not let this bring me down but I can't help it. The process has already been so long and I need some good news for a change.