Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Is this really so wrong...

I'm at the nail salon for a pedicure. All the people that work at the salon I go to are from Vietnam. I've been going there a while so my nail girl "K" always asks about the adoption. Here's how the conversation went (after telling her that things were pretty slow right now):

K: You know, I have family in Vietnam. I'm sure they can find a baby for you. If my sister had 3 kids and I had none, she would give me one of hers- that's commonly done. It would be easy to find you a baby.
Me: Really... and how would I get her back to the US?
K: You can travel there to get her.
Me: Without a passport for her? Definitely illegal.
K: What if you travel there and take her back as your own (birth child)?
Me: YOU can travel there and possibly claim her as your own but I couldn't get away with that. Short of moving to Vietnam, I just don't see how this would work out. Even with the BM willingly giving up the baby, it would still be baby trafficing, if not kidnapping since I never legally adopted the baby. Thanks for trying to help but, no.

This had to be one on my more "interesting" conversations with K. Definitely a different perspective.


tocspaw said...

I spoke to someone from Vietnam recently and had a similar conversation. Her brother also lives in the US, and is trying to adopt from Vietnam. He says it's really common to be offered children for money under the table. Guess it's still an unstable situation there...

Joannah said...

Wow - that's eye opening! My mom's Chinese/Taiwanese neighbor told her that if I paid more I could have a more beautiful Chinese baby. I don't think we're dealing with the same cultural values, you know?

Gen said...

I had to laugh because I never thought that people would be "finding" babies for me.

My sweet neighbor casually told me one day that her sister's friend's brother and his wife couldn't afford to keep their baby and were going to give him up for adoption - so "of course" she thought of me.

I didn't say anything except that I hope that everything works out for the best and thank you for thinking of me. I mean, I was in shock, and what exactly do you say to something like that????? It felt really odd and...perhaps thinking that people thought that I was desperate for a child. Such a strange position to be put in!

But they mean well :)

Lisa and Tate said...

Hmmmmmmm- I had that happen getting a pedicture too!!! Kind of like you want a baby??? I'll get one for you.... Tempting but NO THANKS!!!